72 lines
4.9 KiB
Markdown
Executable File
72 lines
4.9 KiB
Markdown
Executable File
---
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layout: main
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title: Yes, there is a spiritual side
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sub-title: It is the question that drives us
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---
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It's taken me a while to come out with it, but here it goes. The nice quote (got it?) has truth in it. Though we often don't
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know what the question is and that is fine. It is the search that drives us and almost defines us as humans.
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The search for higher meaning, the meaning of life, truth, love or any of them in a mix, is what makes us human.
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Alas, the search for wealth, comfort or as in the case of science, facts, is not fulfilling and thus i need to make the
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distinction here.
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### It started with truth and ended with love
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In hindsight it was even the search for truth that got me to study physics 25 odd years ago.
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Not conciously at the time, and it was only much later that i could express the anger at the deception.
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There is off course no truth in Physics, or science, though it was a hard nut to swallow.
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Science is about facts, usually irrelavant facts. Irrelevant to the person's life that is learning and teaching.
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It's about talking in detail about the irrelevant, while never mentioning that it is irrelevant.
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Science is about pretence of knowlege, not real knowledge which is about life, love, or something meaningful.
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The sign of intelligence is surely learning and reflection.
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But while it is not a big step to realise that what everyone needs to learn most is how to be fullfilled
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(colloqually called happy), and the reflection that matters most is that of ones own life,
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it is also a step rarely taken.
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Sadly all the talk about not meaningful things is keeping most people quite busy and away from any meaningful self-searching.
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I have done my spiritual search, it started long ago, lead me to my master and finding the truth and love.
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Spiritually i have searched and i have found. I am left without question. That is, for me (not generally, or you) i have answers to any meaningful question. And i am completely fulfilled in my life, my work, and most importantly my love. My whole life is a whole, not as it used to be many distinct parts and i have no problems, either in daily life or in general.
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### An echo, karma unfulfilled
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So why am still doing this and not out there teaching. At least it seems that anyone who has realized anything feels the
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need to go forth and tell others. But it is not my way and that is ok, in the same way that not everyone who learns english
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becomes an english teacher.
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The best i can come up with it that there is still karma that needs to be cleaned. Just to clarify, karma is unresolved
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problems left from our forebares or ones own action before they were concious. I was surely not concious when i first
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started with virtual machines and so i get to clean that up now.
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But don't misunderstand, i don't resent my karma (another great matrix line). I accept it and am willing to clean my bit
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up, even i can see that much of it has been handed down from my parents. I don't blame them (or anyone) as they got handed
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their bit from their parents and did their best. It is the way of things, and i have long ago resolved to do my bit
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to further human conciousness as i can (starting in me).
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So i just wanted to say that this project in itself is not important in any sense of the word.
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And the main meaning i get from it, is the cleaning of my karma.
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### The way back
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I noticed that quite quickly after i started the project, i was diverging radically from old ideas. And actually that
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is not just from my old ideas, which is nice in itself. A certain freshness and the fact that i am not just going over
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old ground. No, it's from any old ideas that i am aware of.
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I just noticed another kide project with similar goals, but sort of more traditional choices. Ie llvm to generate binaries
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and a more static aproach. And that would have been me as a younger version. Now i go the long way because i know i have
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all the time i need, and what matters is direction, not speed.
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The way it is happening is that i am reexamining just about everything i touch. A part of that is the kind of no stone
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unturned mentality. Thoroughness in a way.
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But mostly it is a reexamination of everything i learned. It is going back over old ground and really looking at things,
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seeing them in a fresh way and coming to mostly new conclusions. Off course the main reason we get so much done so quickly
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in software engineering these days is that we build on previous, and other peoples work. But so much of that is just
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layer on layers of stuff that is not needed. And they are not just baggage, they really stop doing things differently.
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Going over this old ground and finding new ways does give me a certain satisfaction and already has lead to a much better
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understanding of what programming actually is. Also i find it meaningful that this sense of rediscovery is so similar to
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what the spiritual path was about for me. And the idea does make me smile, that i am now a spiritual programmer.
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